LATE 20s/EARLY 30s? TIME TO CHECK FOR BAD HABITS?

Posted on 4th June, 2017

For many women, there comes a time when some of the habits they had formed at the age of 18 are causing them problems.  Many sense they may be making things difficult for themselves, but can't always see precisely why.  Very often, a careful analysis will show that the root causes are habits they developed as children or teenagers which are dysfunctional.

 

Exanples might include poor time-keeping; erratic sleeping patterns; late-rising; procrastination; not keeping to agreed plans; persistently telling "little lies" as excuses; frequent binge drinking; poor diet; and so on.

 

Bad habits such as these can cause serious problems as time passes because:

(1) increasing responsibilities create more pressure to deliver good performance;

(2) with practice and rising seniority, we all get better at hiding our bad habits or becoming complacent and pretending they are merely little eccentricities.

 

Experience suggests that some woman in their 20s or early 30s may be especially at risk.  These are women who experienced a sudden change in their disciplinary arrangements when they were growing up.  The effect of a sudden and dramatic change in a child's disciplinary framework can be confusion - and the need for the child to quickly improvise her own rules of conduct for survival.  She may then become fiercely stubborn in defending such rules/habits; even if they are no longer appropriate. 

 

Worse, she may not even be aware of just how stubborn and irrational she has become in insisting that her bad habits are normal and part of her character.  

 

What can be done?

 

The Senior Tutor recommends an ABC check-up to analyse problem areas and looks for root causes in deeply-engrained bad habits that have become established over the years.

 

This in itself may be very useful, in part.

 

However, by their very nature, bad habits can sometimes be very difficult to control and eradicate.

 

Experience shows that traditional corporal punishment - applied sensibly, firmly and fairly - can be immensely effective in jolting a recipient into amending her behaviour. 

 

A key reason is that a spanking or caning both hurts and humbles.  A pupil with a really silly and immature bad habit is forced to re-evaluate her views if she finds herself across her tutor's knee with her bottom bared and being spanked.  In such a position she can no longer defiantly "stand on her dignity" - indeed, in order to salvage her dignity, she has to admit that she fully deserves to be punished and show that she accepts her punishment bravely and with good grace.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There may be other cases in which a pupil shows herself to be too complacent or arrogant to address a serious problem.  The situation may then have to monitored to establish the full nature and frequency of the problem.  After being warned, the pupil may find herself being "put on report for persistent misbehaviour".  This is serious.  A caning certainly hurts and humbles; and 12 strokes of a swishy cane given through a thin pair of trousers can hurt quite a lot.  Not to cause any real harm, of course, but to create a very subdued pupil with a fiercely smarting bottom that has some stripes across it for a short while.

 

A caning for "persistent behaviour" gives a pupil a very effective jolt; and makes her very subdued and receptive to changes in her behaviour.  It is, of course, very important that she understands precisely why she deserves and needs to be punished with a caning; and that she reconciles herself to accepting the punishment bravely and with good grace.  

 

 

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WHAT ABOUT STRAPPING A PUPIL'S HANDS?

 

Corporal punishment is generally given on a pupil's bottom... but what about her hands?

 

I am bound to say that I tend to dislike strapping her hands BUT this may be sensible for a minor infraction or minor misconduct in a review meeting.  The strokes should be light and few.

 

 However, there is another occasion when one, two or three quite hard strokes of a strap might usefully be applied to each of the pupil's hands.  This is before a caning.

 

The pupil has been told she is to be caned, and how many strokes she will get.  Even if she has never been caned before, she will be sure the cane will create a very painful sting across he bottom and she will be conscious of how humbling it will be to have to bend over and present her bottom.

 

However, her trepidation can be made worse.  She can be told that, before she bends over for the cane, she will have to very submissively hold out each of her hands in turn to get a strap across it.  Holding out her hands is a rehearsal for the more abject act of submission involved in bending over.  The unpleasant sting of the strap brings it home that the cane is going to hurt.

 

This can be a useful refinement.

 

It should be no more than that, though.

 

If a pupil has misbehaved and needs to be punished, her general expectation should be that she is going to get her bottom smacked